I love this Psalm! It so captures the desperation with which I’ve come to God SOOOOOmany times in my life.
“From the ends of the earth I call to you” – David here is expressing that feeling so well: the feeling of seeming so far from God but knowing that no matter how far I feel from Him – even the ends of the earth away – i’ts not too far for Him to hear me. Even if its just a whisper. “I call as my heart grows faint”. I’ve come to know that He is, in fact “a rock that is higher than I” and so I crave that presence in my life.
I’ve come to know it through his faithfulness. He has NEVER let me down. He has NEVERfailed to show me his graciousness and forgiveness and joy even in the most difficult times. Even when I’ve done wrong, or others have wronged me, he has ALWAYS revealed his peace and strength during tough times. That’s why I have the confidence to stand on him as my rock even when my heart grows faint: “For you HAVE BEEN my refuge, a strong tower against my foe”.
Right now I’m going through a ‘season of suckiness’ in some ways, and my heart does indeed grow faint. But although there’s no exhilaration to pray through my disappointments, there’s absolutely an understanding that in the shelter of his wings is where I want to be.
I don’t always particularly FEEL like jumping up and down and praising him, but I think that as I’ve become older, I’ve become more settled with the idea that God is FOR me and He is in fact the rock that is higher than I. He is my strength. He is my refuge. He hears my cry. I don’t doubt it for a second even when I don’t feel it. And for this reason “I will ever praise your name, and fulfil my vows day after day”…
– Fiona Elliott